Arh..arh… I reallie had a fun day today!!! I cannot say how much excitement I had when I went out with dar dar lor…. Okeiokei.. let me start on wad happened today…
Woke up about 12 when Patrick called me to go out.. but I didn’t want to, coz I wanted to go out with dar dar… so in the end I changed my mind and went out with dar dar… left the house at around 2 plus went over to his blk downstairs wait for him.. he took so long to get ready.. was actually wondering wad will he wear.. heehee… but he came down with his ‘califonia fitness staff’ t-shirt.. heheee.. with jeans and sports shoe… simple but nice lor… den we went to take bus 51 to enous mrt.. on the bus when he put his hand on my lap.. I felt the sensational feeling tht he was treating me as a gf.. but it was not that… he was actualle showing me wad jackal will do when we sit bus.. haha.. lame lor.. laughed and laughed the whoel time.. den while walking to enous mrt… I can’t help not holding his arm.. I juz wanna feel the closenest with him.. the feeling was so nice… den we went to talk mrt and took the mrt to bugis… so before leaving the bugis station, he told me not to hold his hand coz he was afraid that he will see his gf’s frens or wad so ever… while walking to bugis levis shope.. he den noticed that the one at bugis dose not accept the voucher… so we walked all the way to suntec.. as usual he complained that it was veri far… but den we still walked… den when we were there, we went to find the levis shop… saw some pants but then they had veri limited types of pants.. den I told him wad about we went to marina square levis shop, they should have more variety… den we headed there… walked again… den went there.. saw a few different type of colours and also type that were between size 31 and 32… den he saw this engineered jeans which was a bit greenish-blue.. the fabric was a bit thin and nice to touch… relaxing… den I found another jeans which I tink is 506 or 508… but it is nice lor.. hehee… he gt to use the voucher for the pants without sales… heeheex.. he onli spend $45.50 for the 2 pairs of jeans… the engineered jeans was $40… the other one was $65.50… den he used the $60 voucher for the non saled jeans… after buying jeans… we went to eat ice cream.. both of us shared a rum and raisin ice cream.. heehee… $3.90 … den he brought me to see 9000sqft home fix that was about to come up… it was like a 3 room flat space lor… waste of space… hahah… den after that we walked back to suntech den after going to carefore to get a drink then I went to the toilet… when coming out.. I saw dar dar toking to another guy… went we left.. he told me that the guy was his gf’s brother.. I was shocked…. Nearly held his arm lor.. heehee…. But den we forgot about it and headed to bugis…. We went to bugis village.. wanted to find the guy that I bought ear ring from… when I saw the guy, I was shocked that he remembered me… he asked me if I changed bf.. den I said that he was onli my fren… heehe.e.. den the other guy who knew terry asked me when was terry going for reserves.. I told him june… heehee.. den after toking for a while den we left to see the underwear that can wrap his di di.,.. heehee.. it was cute.. den we went down to see the newly opened bugis… bumped into shu mei.. she still working there.,. hhahha… den after that we walked to mos burger to have a drink of iced milk tea… den we started looking at other girls… hai~ it was veri fun lor… den we took mrt back.. I finally could hold his arm.. the filling is so so so nice lor.. at enous waiting for the bus stop.. I called wei ping to confirm about tml;s dinner meeting.. heehe. But dar wanted to tok to her.. keep asking ping who was he.. actually ping guessed correctly… but it’s juz tt dar dun wanna tell her the truth… keep making her say out the names that she tink I noe… like Patrick…xingwei.. daniel… hahaa… den when boarded the bus, saw felix slping lone… I purposely bumped into him to give him a shock.. he immediately woke up and said soorie.. den when he got closer look at me.. he was stunned to see me.. heehee… saw his gf’s photo.. quite nice…. Heehee..den toked to felix until he alighted.. dar was toking to ping the whole time.. dunnoe tok wd lar.. ehehhe… den dar left first… den I left and went home….
When I reached home and bathed… he msged me..
DarDar: u sad anot?
Mar: sad u going to meet lao da lor… but today veri happy can go out shopping with u..
DarDar: sorry.. I dunno if I’m a life boy to u.. but I’m quite happy to have u..
Mar: wow.. tt is veri touching to hear.. I am touched.. me juz bathed finish
DarDar: coz I really dunno if I’m a life boy to u until u found someone else
Mar: life boy u mean.. erm.. tis thing hard to say lor.. I may treat u as my bf.. BUT sometimes I feel bad.. coz u gt gf.. I juz taking this one step at a time lor…
DarDar: I really dunno how u feel for me?
Mar: I love u and hope that we can be in a relationship..
DarDar: ssad..but how u really feel for me now?
Mar: my feeling is getting more and more everytime I am with u
DarDar: I hope so 2.. ut hope u can understand the position I’m in now.. maybe we could right.. who knows wad will happen
Mar: I am glad u can give me a chance to be in ur life..
DarDar: meeting her lei.. call u lata..
Tt’s all…
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Thursday, January 20, 2005
getting closer to bee
That day I was suppose to write in a entry but then I was toking on the phone with alex.. telling him my story and life lar.. hai~.. that nite.. dar dar was like giving a very big hint that he was treating me more than a fling… it was a very intensive tok that we had becoz he was angry that I accompanied Dixon in the morning after comm. Skill and then went to meet jackal in the afternoon… then in the nite around 10 something den I went to find him… he didn’t eat lor… so bad hor me.. I went back so late becoz I saw swee ming at far east… den we sat down and toked about last time… and now lar… it was a long tok lor.. heehee… den I went home like 12 something after seeing dar dar… den around 2 something came out again to meet him.. he wanted to eat… so we went kopitiam to eat.. but at that time he was not so angry already lar… but conversation was still litte lor.. I uz continued watching tv while he was eating laksa… den we went to my house the blk there and tok… he started asking indirect question and giving indirect answer but I am smart, I noe wad he means lor… but after that when I went back. I seriously thought it through and decided to stay a distance away from Dixon, but it is difficult lor… hoe to siah~.. I see him almost everyday and for jackal.. he always call me lei… but I was tinking after the phone I will part with him and try to stay a distance.. I will try to do it..
Toking about today then… after my last paper… me, jerren, Jason, john and dixon went to east gate to eat…. Den after that I said I wanted to go home… so after going to hougang mall.. I went home… slacked at home the whole day… den when dar dar went home.. he fell asleep until his lao dao called him at around 11 to 12 something… around 1 like that I went out to his place… but before I went to his place, I went to buy bread for him to eat and plum juice… his favourite. See I so nice… diao~ den went up to his place.. he was already watching treasure island finishing already lr.. den we… afther that I turned on meet the fockers and watched while he fell asleep… halfway watching, ping msged me.. so I called her… den I put on earpiece and let dar dar hear… den I started to say some lame jokes.. ping laugh until stomach pain lor.. but I can se that dar dar purposely dun wanna laugh out lor.. can see that he was enjoying it lar… den around 3 something den we went to puggol lasi lemak there and he ate fishball noodle ‘mee pok’ less chilli… den I drank tea… we toked and laughed until my mouth stiff lor.. it was lots of fun… den I asked him if he treat me as his gf or as a fling, he keep asking me u noe wad… that type of thing… I tu him back lor.. I thought someone say that he tok dun beat around the bush wan.. den he nothing to say.. but he summary is that he reallie treat me as his gf… taking care and concerning about me lor… den aroung 5.30 like that we walked back… walk until the field then I had to walk back myself.. idiot lor.. he dun wanna accompany.. hai~.. nvm lar.. it was reallie lotz of fun toking and crapping a lot lor.. hahaha…. Den maybe tml going to follow him go buy pants or going to accompany ‘ai ai’ to make his car den go his place watch vcd… dunnoe yet lor… haiA~.. I wanna accompany dar dar lor.. ‘ai ai’ can wait lor.. nvm lor… now feeling slpy after laughing and joking so much juz now.. heehee… see I another time lar,, I go slp already… tired already…
Toking about today then… after my last paper… me, jerren, Jason, john and dixon went to east gate to eat…. Den after that I said I wanted to go home… so after going to hougang mall.. I went home… slacked at home the whole day… den when dar dar went home.. he fell asleep until his lao dao called him at around 11 to 12 something… around 1 like that I went out to his place… but before I went to his place, I went to buy bread for him to eat and plum juice… his favourite. See I so nice… diao~ den went up to his place.. he was already watching treasure island finishing already lr.. den we… afther that I turned on meet the fockers and watched while he fell asleep… halfway watching, ping msged me.. so I called her… den I put on earpiece and let dar dar hear… den I started to say some lame jokes.. ping laugh until stomach pain lor.. but I can se that dar dar purposely dun wanna laugh out lor.. can see that he was enjoying it lar… den around 3 something den we went to puggol lasi lemak there and he ate fishball noodle ‘mee pok’ less chilli… den I drank tea… we toked and laughed until my mouth stiff lor.. it was lots of fun… den I asked him if he treat me as his gf or as a fling, he keep asking me u noe wad… that type of thing… I tu him back lor.. I thought someone say that he tok dun beat around the bush wan.. den he nothing to say.. but he summary is that he reallie treat me as his gf… taking care and concerning about me lor… den aroung 5.30 like that we walked back… walk until the field then I had to walk back myself.. idiot lor.. he dun wanna accompany.. hai~.. nvm lar.. it was reallie lotz of fun toking and crapping a lot lor.. hahaha…. Den maybe tml going to follow him go buy pants or going to accompany ‘ai ai’ to make his car den go his place watch vcd… dunnoe yet lor… haiA~.. I wanna accompany dar dar lor.. ‘ai ai’ can wait lor.. nvm lor… now feeling slpy after laughing and joking so much juz now.. heehee… see I another time lar,, I go slp already… tired already…
Monday, January 17, 2005
trouble ahead!!!
Just had a 1 hr 40 min and 36 sec conversation with terry… had to force him to pour out everything that was inside him.. but he nanaged to state the 3 issues that were bothering him:
1) the night when I stayed overnight till morning with bee… told him I went drinking with bee, qian li and his gf and 1 couple.. tis incident he said that he had already promised me to forgive and forget…
2) when we were on the bus going to my home, then we were listening to fm on my hp… bee called and I, in the state of panick, took the ear piece away from his ear.
3) When we were ice skating at jurong… jimmy msged “dear, got miss me anot.” Got to explain to him who jimmy is lor… that toopid fellow.. gt me into deep shit…
These were the 3 reasons that he stated that he had been tinking about.. acrually to summarize the conversation, there were other reasons that he brought up:
4) He felt very uneasy when he came over for Christmas. He couldn’t except that my whole family were catholic and actually didn’t want to stay on.
5) His fren caught me going to hougang plaza 4 plus times.. but I told him that I was sleeping.. I kept dening… but I tink it didn’t work
6) He thought about where we were going to haf our wedding… becoz he is Buddhist and I was catholic… but that is a long time issue
7) He didn’t understand why I had to frequent go out in the middle of the night and go out with guy frens to play pool or wad so ever…
8) During the conversation, victor called.. I put him on conference den he go and tok.. toopid fool… but luckily he put down the phone and we went on the conversation…
Besides that, he asked his so called best frens about our problem and his frens told him that if they were in his shoe, they will surely break… but he didn’t do it becoz he felt that I have committed and done a lot for this relationship…
Can say that wad mad tis happened is all my fault… flirty by nature is my greatest weakness.. I cannot say wrong but onli admitting it..wad I have done wrong is always the cause of any break up or misunderstanding in the relationship.. for now I can only wad and pray that he will come to his senses and let us continue on with our life.. but in another way, I must also agree of the negative answer that will come.. which I hope not.. or else I will have a veri big difficulty in answering with my relatives… reallie hard time.. I dun even noe how to face with my cousins lor.. hai~ wad they will say about me and so on…
Everybody makes mistakes and I have made a veri huge mistake.. I will regret for the rest of my life if anything bad will happen… as I wait for the answer in one or two weeks time.. I will try to stay out of hougang plaza where his fren saw me at… dangerous if his frens see me there again… no more pool.. sad… maybe other places when bee gets a bike or his van back lor.. hehe.. in the meantime I will still have to concentrate on my exam lata… hai~.. will update more…
1) the night when I stayed overnight till morning with bee… told him I went drinking with bee, qian li and his gf and 1 couple.. tis incident he said that he had already promised me to forgive and forget…
2) when we were on the bus going to my home, then we were listening to fm on my hp… bee called and I, in the state of panick, took the ear piece away from his ear.
3) When we were ice skating at jurong… jimmy msged “dear, got miss me anot.” Got to explain to him who jimmy is lor… that toopid fellow.. gt me into deep shit…
These were the 3 reasons that he stated that he had been tinking about.. acrually to summarize the conversation, there were other reasons that he brought up:
4) He felt very uneasy when he came over for Christmas. He couldn’t except that my whole family were catholic and actually didn’t want to stay on.
5) His fren caught me going to hougang plaza 4 plus times.. but I told him that I was sleeping.. I kept dening… but I tink it didn’t work
6) He thought about where we were going to haf our wedding… becoz he is Buddhist and I was catholic… but that is a long time issue
7) He didn’t understand why I had to frequent go out in the middle of the night and go out with guy frens to play pool or wad so ever…
8) During the conversation, victor called.. I put him on conference den he go and tok.. toopid fool… but luckily he put down the phone and we went on the conversation…
Besides that, he asked his so called best frens about our problem and his frens told him that if they were in his shoe, they will surely break… but he didn’t do it becoz he felt that I have committed and done a lot for this relationship…
Can say that wad mad tis happened is all my fault… flirty by nature is my greatest weakness.. I cannot say wrong but onli admitting it..wad I have done wrong is always the cause of any break up or misunderstanding in the relationship.. for now I can only wad and pray that he will come to his senses and let us continue on with our life.. but in another way, I must also agree of the negative answer that will come.. which I hope not.. or else I will have a veri big difficulty in answering with my relatives… reallie hard time.. I dun even noe how to face with my cousins lor.. hai~ wad they will say about me and so on…
Everybody makes mistakes and I have made a veri huge mistake.. I will regret for the rest of my life if anything bad will happen… as I wait for the answer in one or two weeks time.. I will try to stay out of hougang plaza where his fren saw me at… dangerous if his frens see me there again… no more pool.. sad… maybe other places when bee gets a bike or his van back lor.. hehe.. in the meantime I will still have to concentrate on my exam lata… hai~.. will update more…
Thursday, January 13, 2005
I feel reallie hurt…. Cut reallie deeply in my heart… it is not that I broke up.. but as I am writing tis… I have juz cried my sorrows out… why I cried.. for now I dun tink that I am tinking too much...
Tml is his off day… and I thought he will take the intiative to come and spend time with me.. but no lor.. he went home.. can u believe it.. it’s been like one week since I met and see him and he dosen’t even miss seeing me… msged him the other day to ask him “do u miss me or even miss seeing me?” u noe wad was his answer… “okie lar”!!! wad the fuck!!! It juz shows that he doesn’t care.. or even miss me lor.. I am trying very hard to tink about him coz he is busy… but the thing is tt he doesn’t tink about tis relationship but all bout his work lor…I reallie try to understand his proble,.. but the thing is he doesn’t understand my ‘cu zong’ lor…
On the 29th… I wrote him a letter of how I felt bout tis relationship… but I didn’t give him that time coz I was not in the state of mind that time… I made up my mind oin giving the letter to him.. I am reallie trying veri hard to stay focus in this relationship… but the more he dosen’t spend time with me.. it is very difficult for me to go on lor.. I juz need to cool down and recollect is it myself on whether it is my fault or it’s just my weird imagination… going to play maple… hope tml will be a betta day…
I am going to msg him… I cannot take it anymore!!!
Mar: why u nvr come over to my place today?
Terry: why lei?
(wad a reply lor!!! This type if thing muz ask y wan meh!!!)
Mar: nvr mind… u dun even wan to see me.. or even spend time with me… even tml is ur off.
Terry: what u trying to say? I meeting des to collect my things ma. Weekend then accompany u can, I need to settle my kitchen stuff tml…
(all about work!!! Everytime work!!!)
Mar: I won’t be free on weekend lor… I got exams next week.. I have been trying to understand ur work busy… but u can also try to squeeze ur busy working schedule for me wad…
(hope I am not asking too much..)
Terry: yesterday I wan to meet you but you at bedok. So I went home… ya tml my off then tonight I must go ur house… I also got stuff to settle and do lor.. hai
(lucky I nvr meet him or else in the nite cannot see bee bee.. heex)
Mar: den yesterday u dunnoe how to ask me.. I will do anything for u wan lor… I juz want to spend time with u.. is it very difficult.. I feel veri lost now…
(dunnoe he will say something caring or some nonsence words)
Terry: you gt project ma.. and I work until veri tired le…
(lame.. say wanna come.. den now say tired…)
Mar: I dun wanna say anymore… I juz wanna tell you that I reallie miss you a lot… I can’t slp at times juz tinking of u…u won’t understand how I feel..nvm.. slp early den..
(juz dun wanna quarrel on.. or else.. it will surely turn veri ugly)
ended
Tml is his off day… and I thought he will take the intiative to come and spend time with me.. but no lor.. he went home.. can u believe it.. it’s been like one week since I met and see him and he dosen’t even miss seeing me… msged him the other day to ask him “do u miss me or even miss seeing me?” u noe wad was his answer… “okie lar”!!! wad the fuck!!! It juz shows that he doesn’t care.. or even miss me lor.. I am trying very hard to tink about him coz he is busy… but the thing is tt he doesn’t tink about tis relationship but all bout his work lor…I reallie try to understand his proble,.. but the thing is he doesn’t understand my ‘cu zong’ lor…
On the 29th… I wrote him a letter of how I felt bout tis relationship… but I didn’t give him that time coz I was not in the state of mind that time… I made up my mind oin giving the letter to him.. I am reallie trying veri hard to stay focus in this relationship… but the more he dosen’t spend time with me.. it is very difficult for me to go on lor.. I juz need to cool down and recollect is it myself on whether it is my fault or it’s just my weird imagination… going to play maple… hope tml will be a betta day…
I am going to msg him… I cannot take it anymore!!!
Mar: why u nvr come over to my place today?
Terry: why lei?
(wad a reply lor!!! This type if thing muz ask y wan meh!!!)
Mar: nvr mind… u dun even wan to see me.. or even spend time with me… even tml is ur off.
Terry: what u trying to say? I meeting des to collect my things ma. Weekend then accompany u can, I need to settle my kitchen stuff tml…
(all about work!!! Everytime work!!!)
Mar: I won’t be free on weekend lor… I got exams next week.. I have been trying to understand ur work busy… but u can also try to squeeze ur busy working schedule for me wad…
(hope I am not asking too much..)
Terry: yesterday I wan to meet you but you at bedok. So I went home… ya tml my off then tonight I must go ur house… I also got stuff to settle and do lor.. hai
(lucky I nvr meet him or else in the nite cannot see bee bee.. heex)
Mar: den yesterday u dunnoe how to ask me.. I will do anything for u wan lor… I juz want to spend time with u.. is it very difficult.. I feel veri lost now…
(dunnoe he will say something caring or some nonsence words)
Terry: you gt project ma.. and I work until veri tired le…
(lame.. say wanna come.. den now say tired…)
Mar: I dun wanna say anymore… I juz wanna tell you that I reallie miss you a lot… I can’t slp at times juz tinking of u…u won’t understand how I feel..nvm.. slp early den..
(juz dun wanna quarrel on.. or else.. it will surely turn veri ugly)
ended
Sunday, January 09, 2005
I myself can’t believe myself… I am actually crying… for wad reason… becoz I miss bee bee… omg.. it’s onli been 2 days onli since I met him on thurs… it’s onli been 2 days!!! I stress!!!! I am crying and missing him so so much more than hubby.. I am going mad soon.. I am missing him so bloody much.. he was at his gf’s place yesterday… didn’t call me the whole nite.. was waiting for his call.. at that time I was out with jackal… but I was tinking of bee bee the whole time lor… tis inflactuation is getting totally out of hand.. I dunnoe how to control it… if I dun see beebee… I will go insane lor.. if I continue to see him.. I am afraid that it will cheating on my heart lor..hai~…
I dunnoe wad to do.. I am lost.. den today.. he said maybe he can meet me… but den juz now he call and tell me that he staying at his gf’s place.. his fren ask him to fetch him to work…. Hai~… totally spoil my mood lor.. I am farking bored lor… I also farking lost… I am farking in love with beebee…. Arh… help…
Ha.. feeling so much betta now….. juz came back after playing pool and drinking tea with Dixon… hehee… hai~ SAW JIMMY.. hehee.. no special feelings towards him already.. but I find him beri ‘bo liao’ . he was veri near me.. and he still has to call me or msg me… somemore when he call me he must hide under the table and tok.. siao lor… ask me whether I miss him.. for wad fark I miss him… who cares bout him… rebellious unmatured man… tt is the impression he gimmie…. Hai~ who cares.. goin to play maple for a while den go to slp… tink I going to give dar a morning call at 730.. he said he gt to wake up at that time… reallie looking forward to seeing bee bee tml if possible lar… as I said I miss him a lot lor… heehee.. hope tt he will dream of me and remember me…
I dunnoe wad to do.. I am lost.. den today.. he said maybe he can meet me… but den juz now he call and tell me that he staying at his gf’s place.. his fren ask him to fetch him to work…. Hai~… totally spoil my mood lor.. I am farking bored lor… I also farking lost… I am farking in love with beebee…. Arh… help…
Ha.. feeling so much betta now….. juz came back after playing pool and drinking tea with Dixon… hehee… hai~ SAW JIMMY.. hehee.. no special feelings towards him already.. but I find him beri ‘bo liao’ . he was veri near me.. and he still has to call me or msg me… somemore when he call me he must hide under the table and tok.. siao lor… ask me whether I miss him.. for wad fark I miss him… who cares bout him… rebellious unmatured man… tt is the impression he gimmie…. Hai~ who cares.. goin to play maple for a while den go to slp… tink I going to give dar a morning call at 730.. he said he gt to wake up at that time… reallie looking forward to seeing bee bee tml if possible lar… as I said I miss him a lot lor… heehee.. hope tt he will dream of me and remember me…
Friday, January 07, 2005
it’s a start of a brand new year…2005!!! Heehee… while writing this… I am also playing maple.. at hunting ground… trying to find pan lid.. a kind of shield.. eehee… a lot of ppl are sellin for a veri high price.. but I prefer to find myself.. and get it for free…
came back not long.. was with bee bee.. went to 401 to eat supper den go punggol park walk walk.. actually not walk lr.. we sat at the playground talk talk.. hai~ starting to realize that me and bee getting more and more close lor… nvr see him will fill vri uncomfortable… I also dunnoe why… hai~ die lor.. he even ask me if I will leave dar and go for him.. but at the meantime it is impossible lor.. he also gt gf.. veri difficult to say lor… somemore he so fierce… scared lar.. hehe.. went to play maple.. now back…the truth is that.. I met bee more than I meet dar lor…but I still love dar lar… but not the completely love lar… my heart still has a place for bee lor.. all the while I told myself not to mess up my relationship now.. it was going veri smoothly lr.. but the other while.. I gt to noe bee bee and now I am reallie very close to him.. to the extend that I will even miss him when dar is around lor.. sometimes I just wish to spend a day with him shopping instead of always going out at nite.. but come to tink of it.. I llike him is becoz he gt ride… and some is SUSKI 1000(K1)… veri comfi lor… hai~… tml he selling his bike and getting a mers van sponsored by his company which is totally free lor.. I dunnoe whether my heart will change for him anot.. sad case lei.. women are materistic people lar… who doesn’t want ppl to drive them around in bike.. at this age maybe that is wad I tink lar… when I grow up in the working world… tink can die lei… but I hope I will still be with dar lar…
I have already dreamt of settling down with dar and get married and live the rest of my life with him and have kids lor… but now with beebee…. It is beri difficult for me to even tink lor.. I am scared that wad he said will come true.. like even though the relationship can lasted veri long.. something will happen to make it end… and I am afraid of that.. wait arh…okei back.. haha still can’t get the pan lid.. idiot lor.. okie.. let’s get back to the topic.. hai~.. in a mess lar… when single tis type of thing dun wanna happen… hai~… when attach.. all the rubbish start to appear.. sian half lor… but I also dun wan to see beebee and her gf break… me and beebee 10 yrs apart.. but the thing is I still can click with him and tok all sorts of topic lor… tt’s one thing tt I admire myself… I can tok to the matured crowd easily… with hesitation I can say,,, like for Vincent aka jackal… he also wad. Tt time at sentosa when he gt to noe me.. we also chat like nobody’s business… ping also gt a shock… den.. somemore joe was 33… haha… jackal 27.. beebee 28… so nice…
Oh yah… I forgot.. yesterday went taka with ping to find some birthday bear.. den I suddenly tink of getting for him lor… dunnoe y.. but I had already found dar’s lar… den called him and asked him.. when he saw the bear.. he was shocked… asked him if he liked it.. his face showed that he liked lar.. but I dunnoe whether the hear got say anything bad like childish or anything… I dun mind getting things for ppl lor… just a small gift onli wad hor… nothing wan lah… wait arh…hai~.. still gt nothing from the greewn mushroom… sianz…
Tink tt’s all lar.. will be back to continue of anything happens…
came back not long.. was with bee bee.. went to 401 to eat supper den go punggol park walk walk.. actually not walk lr.. we sat at the playground talk talk.. hai~ starting to realize that me and bee getting more and more close lor… nvr see him will fill vri uncomfortable… I also dunnoe why… hai~ die lor.. he even ask me if I will leave dar and go for him.. but at the meantime it is impossible lor.. he also gt gf.. veri difficult to say lor… somemore he so fierce… scared lar.. hehe.. went to play maple.. now back…the truth is that.. I met bee more than I meet dar lor…but I still love dar lar… but not the completely love lar… my heart still has a place for bee lor.. all the while I told myself not to mess up my relationship now.. it was going veri smoothly lr.. but the other while.. I gt to noe bee bee and now I am reallie very close to him.. to the extend that I will even miss him when dar is around lor.. sometimes I just wish to spend a day with him shopping instead of always going out at nite.. but come to tink of it.. I llike him is becoz he gt ride… and some is SUSKI 1000(K1)… veri comfi lor… hai~… tml he selling his bike and getting a mers van sponsored by his company which is totally free lor.. I dunnoe whether my heart will change for him anot.. sad case lei.. women are materistic people lar… who doesn’t want ppl to drive them around in bike.. at this age maybe that is wad I tink lar… when I grow up in the working world… tink can die lei… but I hope I will still be with dar lar…
I have already dreamt of settling down with dar and get married and live the rest of my life with him and have kids lor… but now with beebee…. It is beri difficult for me to even tink lor.. I am scared that wad he said will come true.. like even though the relationship can lasted veri long.. something will happen to make it end… and I am afraid of that.. wait arh…okei back.. haha still can’t get the pan lid.. idiot lor.. okie.. let’s get back to the topic.. hai~.. in a mess lar… when single tis type of thing dun wanna happen… hai~… when attach.. all the rubbish start to appear.. sian half lor… but I also dun wan to see beebee and her gf break… me and beebee 10 yrs apart.. but the thing is I still can click with him and tok all sorts of topic lor… tt’s one thing tt I admire myself… I can tok to the matured crowd easily… with hesitation I can say,,, like for Vincent aka jackal… he also wad. Tt time at sentosa when he gt to noe me.. we also chat like nobody’s business… ping also gt a shock… den.. somemore joe was 33… haha… jackal 27.. beebee 28… so nice…
Oh yah… I forgot.. yesterday went taka with ping to find some birthday bear.. den I suddenly tink of getting for him lor… dunnoe y.. but I had already found dar’s lar… den called him and asked him.. when he saw the bear.. he was shocked… asked him if he liked it.. his face showed that he liked lar.. but I dunnoe whether the hear got say anything bad like childish or anything… I dun mind getting things for ppl lor… just a small gift onli wad hor… nothing wan lah… wait arh…hai~.. still gt nothing from the greewn mushroom… sianz…
Tink tt’s all lar.. will be back to continue of anything happens…
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